MAX’S STAT BLATS! – Week Seven

In last week’s Stat Blat, whilst looking at the Dynablaster Bombermen, I noted that their defensive line had been an area of weakness but something they’d addressed already with the trade for Aaron Donald. Well, this week the Dynablaster Bombermen’s defensive line scored 75.5 points on their own. That got me wondering about the highest and lowest performances from each positional group through both seasons so far. Was 75.5 a record high for a defensive line? Surely it must be! Read on to find out.

Note: Week 17 of the 2014 season was not included when collating these results.

QB

Highest:

1 Firebirds 37.12 S1 W7 Rusty Wilson
2 Tamworth Two 36.6 S1 W10 Aaron Rodgers
3 Firebirds 36.36 S1 W16 Rusty Wilson
4 Tamworth Two 34.92 S2 W3 Aaron Rodgers
5 Firebirds 34.24 S1 W5 Rusty Wilson

 

The running here are obviously dominated by God’s chosen QB (Wilson) and the Arm of the Doubtful (Rodgers). It’s a classic battle between good and evil.

Lowest:

1 Sadness 0.00 S1 W1 “Fuck You” Cam Newton
2 Breeses 0.36 S1 W16 Andrew Luck
3 Dungeoneers 1.84 S2 W5 Nick “Cunt” Foles
4 Sadness 2.62 S1 W6 Teddy Bridgewater
5 Losers 2.72 S1 W14 Peter Manning

 

Fun fact: In week 14 of season 1, David left Andy Dalton (26.28 points), Joe Flacco (24.36 points) and Derek Carr (22.36 points) on the bench in favour of Peter (2.72 points). Now, kids, that is how you PLOB yourself right up. For those of you wondering, Andrew Luck did not leave that game injured. He threw for just over 100 yards with 0 TDs and 2 interceptions. Impressive stuff.

RB

Highest

1 Breeses 74.2 S2 W5 Isaiah Crowell, Devonta Freeman, Doug Martin
2 Breeses 65.6 S2 W7 Devonta Freeman, Doug Martin, Lamar Miller
3 Firebirds 61.8 S1 W16 CJ Anderson, Jeremy Hill, Marshawn Lynch
4 Tamworth Two 61.6 S2 W6 Chris Ivory, LeSean McCoy, Jonathan Stewart
5 Champions 61.4 S1 W14 Le’veon Bell, Isaiah Crowell, Latavius Murray

 

Come on, who saw that coming at the start of the year? Who also saw Isaiah Crowell and Doug Martin each appearing in 2 of the 5 best RB performances of the Dynabowl so far…

Lowest

1 Dungeoneers 5.625 S1 W9 LaGarette Blount, Branden Oliver
2 Firebirds 7.3 S1 W6 Chris Johnson, Marshawn Lynch
3 Breeses 8.2 S2 W3 Isaiah Crowell, Doug Martin
4 Champions 8.3 S2 W1 Latavius Murray, Damien Williams
5 Firebirds 8.4 S1 W8 Chris Johnson, Marshawn Lynch

 

Crowell, Martin, Latavius Murray and Marshawn Lynch have the distinction of being in both the best and the worst RB groups. If I was better at this I’d probably give you some analysis right now. Here’s what I got: blah blah blah analysis blah blah best-selling book Fantasy Life blah blah analysis blah state-the-obvious.

WR/TE

Highest:

1 Kelkowski 109 S1 W1 Randall Cobb, Calvin Johnson, Jeremy Maclin, Cor!Darelle Patterson, Jordan Cameron, Julius Thomas
2 Losers 93.3 S1 W10 Larry Fitzgerald, Jordy Nelson, Emmanuel Sanders, Torrey Smith, Larry Donnell, Jimmy Graham
3 Kelkowski 91.5 S1 W2 Randall Cobb, Calvin Johnson, Jeremy Maclin, Cor!Darelle Patterson, Julius Thomas, Delanie Walker
4 Firebirds 91 S1 W8 TY Hilton, Julio Jones, Eddie Royal, Demaryius Thomas, Antonio Gates, Rob Gronkowski
5 Firebirds 89.7 S1 W6 TY Hilton, Julio Jones, Mohammed Sanu, Demaryius Thomas, Antonio Gates, Rob Gronkowski

 

We still love you Cor! Darelle! The passing game has never been better than those heady days of the first weeks of the Dynabowl. What a glorious time that was! It just goes to show, it’s a running league.

Lowest:

1 Breeses 12.1 S2 W1 DeSean Jackson, Charles Johnson, Steve Smith Sr., Terrance Williams, Owen Daniels
2 Dungeoneers 14.25 S1 W14 Keenan Allen, Andre Johnson, Brandon Marshall, Kenny Stills, Kyle Rudolph, Jason Witten
3 Breeses 14.4 S1 W9 Dwayne Bowe, Pierre Garcon, Andrew Hawkins, Steve Smith Sr., Zach Ertz
4 DynaHarder 17 S1 W12 Kenny Britt, Julian Edelman, Cecil Shorts III, Sammy Watkins, Jace Amaro
5 Dungeoneers 18.1 S2 W5 Keenan Allen, Amari Cooper, Michael Floyd, Reuben Randle, Coby Fleener

 

Tough reading for fans of the Brees and the Dungeoneers. Probably not surprising reading though.

SPEC

Highest:

1 Dungeoneers 23.6 S2 W4 Cairo Santos, Andy Lee
2 Sadness 22.725 S1 W9 Adam Vinatieri, Shane Lechler
3 DynaHarder 21.3 S1 W11 Mason Crosby, Marquette King
4 Breeses 21.2 S1 W10 Matt Bryant, Brett Kern
5 Dungeoneers 20.475 S1 W12 Cody Parkey, Mike Scifres

 

Lowest:

1 Dungeoneers 1.65 S1 W14 Cody Parkey, Mike Scifres
2 Dungeoneers 3 S1 W4 Cody Parkey, Pat O’Donnell
3 Losers 3.3 S1 W16 Justin Tucker, Donnie Jones
4 Champions 3.95 S1 W6 Shaun Suisham, Brad Nortman
5 Firebirds 4 S1 W8 Dan Bailey, Tim Masthay

 

The Dungeoneers showing that famed consistency hear by having two of the best scoring special teams units and two of the worst. I like that Parkey and Scifres put up over 20 points in week 12 and then under 2 in week 14. Absolute gangbusters.

DL

Highest:

1 Bombermen 75.5 S2 W7 Aaron Donald, Haloti Ngata, Cameron Wake, Mario Williams
2 Breeses 69.5 S1 W10 Marcell Dareus, Aaron Donald, Michael Bennett, Cameron Jordan
3 Kelkowski 58.75 S1 W7 Nick Fairley, Everson Griffen, DeMarcus Ware
4 DynaHarder 55.35 S1 W13 Jonathan Hankins, Ezekiel Ansah, JJ Watt
5 Champions 50.5 S1 W8 Tom Johnson, Robert Quinn, Cameron Wake

 

Well, there’s the answer to your question. Yes, the Bombermen’s score on the line this week was the highest ever. By a comfortable margin too. The players on that top 5 read very much like a who’s who of defensive line talent, it’s not difficult to see why these guys scored like they did. Plus Tom Johnson’s there too. Good old Tom Johnson. Who’s Tom Johnson?

Lowest:

1 Dungeoneers 1.25 S2 W3 Tyrone Crawford, Demarcus Lawrence, Stephen Paea
2= Sadness 1.5 S2 W1 Sharrif Floyd, Damontre Moore, Devin Taylor
2= Sadness 1.5 S1 W1 Michael Brockers, Jared Allen, Calais Campbell
4 Champions 1.75 S1 W4 Steve McClendon, Mike Daniels, Cameron Wake
5 Bombermen 2.5 S2 W1 Kyle Williams, Cameron Wake, Mario Williams

 

A round of applause for the Dynasty of Sadness in managed to fashion a tie for 2nd place in the worst D-line performances of all time. Mike and Mark certainly know how to get their defence off to a strong start to the year. Looking at the players in these units it’s very noticeable that one of these is not like the other. 2.5 points for the Williams twins and Cameron Wake would have been unthinkable last season.

LB

Highest:

1 Champions 63.25 S1 W8 Anthony Barr, Jamie Collins, Justin Houston, Wesley Woodyard
2 DynaHarder 57.55 S1 W5 Von Miller, CJ Mosley, Alec Ogletree, Jason Worilds
3 Kelkowski 55.8 S2 W6 Stephone Anthony, Karlos Dansby, D’Qwell Jackson, Brandon Marshall
4 Champions 55.5 S2 W6 Anthony Barr, Shaq Barrett, Jamie Collins, Justin Houston
5 Champions 53.95 S1 W4 Anthony Barr, Justin Houston, Khalil Mack, Wesley Woodyard

 

It’s like no-one believed me when I said linebacker was the most important fantasy position.

Lowest:

1 Losers 1.25 S2 W3 Ryan Kerrigan, Paul Kruger, Alex Okafor
2 Bombermen 3.5 S2 W7 Connor Barwin, Elvis Dumervil, Sean Lee
3 Firebirds 5 S1 W4 Mason Foster, Julius Peppers, Lawrence Timmons
4 Firebirds 5.75 S1 W3 Mason Foster, Manti Te’o, Lawrence Timmons
5 Dungeoneers 6.25 S1 W8 Connor Barwin, Dwight Freeney, KJ Wright

 

I seriously don’t know who Mason Foster is. If this week’s Stat Blat has made me realise anything it’s quite how bad Neil’s team was at the start of last season. What a tremendous rags to riches story his Dynabowl triumph was. Someone should film that. With Paul Giamatti playing Neil.

DB

Highest:

1 Bombermen 76.45 S1 W10 Casey Hayward, Bradley Roby, Ha-Ha Clinton-Dix, James Ihedigbo
2 Bombermen 73.2 S2 W4 Stephon Gilmore, Bradley Roby, Corey Graham, TJ Ward
3 Sadness 59.75 S2 W3 William Gay, Jerraud Powers, Eric Berry, Tyrann Mathieu
4 Kelkowski 58 S2 W3 Janoris Jenkins, Jimmy Smith, Mike Adams, Malcolm Jenkins
5 Kelkowski 57.55 S1 W13 Janoris Jenkins, Devin McCourty, Mike Adams, Rashad Johnson

 

The fact that the Bombermen and Kelkowski each have 2 entries here somewhat belies my theory that DB scoring is entirely random. Note that the presence of more season 2 scores in this entry than others is likely influenced by the point increased for Defended Passes this season.

Lowest:

1 DynaHarder 3.75 S1 W7 Patrick Peterson, Sam Shields, Deone Bucannon, Jonathan Cyprien
2 Sadness 4.5 S1 W10 Travis Carrie, Kyle Fuller, Eric Berry, Tyrann Mathieu
3 Dungeoneers 5 S1 W11 Vontae Davis, Chris Harris, George Iloka, Rahim Moore
4= Losers 6 S1 W4 Darius Butler, Logan Ryan, Chris Conte, Glover Quin
4= DynaHarder 6 S1 W13 Antoine Cason, Patrick Peterson, Micah Hyde, Eric Reid

 

I can’t help but think that at least three of those entries would make pretty good real-life secondaries. That’s fantasy football for you, I guess.

OFF

Highest:

1 Losers 177.205 S1 W4
2 Kelkowski 165.36 S1 W8
3 Firebirds 164.34 S1 W5
4 Losers 164.21 S2 W2
5 Firebirds 161.62 S1 W14

 

Lowest:

1 Dungeoneers 52.7 S1 W14
2 Sadness 54.97 S1 W11
3 Breeses 58.345 S2 W1
4 Bombermen 62.19 S2 W7
5 Dungeoneers 64.965 S2 W5

 

DEF

Highest:

1 Kelkowski 143.6 S1 W13
2 Tamworth Two 142.05 S2 W6
3 Bombermen 130.95 S1 W10
4 Champions 129.25 S1 W8
5 Firebirds 126.55 S1 W16

 

Lowest:

1 Firebirds 26.75 S1 W1
2 Tamworth Two 27 S1 W16
3 Dungeoneers 32.25 S1 W11
4 Sadness 35 S1 W10
5 Kelkowski 36.5 S1 W14

 

Max Cubberley

Leave a Reply