2019 Dynabowl COTY

2019 DynaBowl Coach of the Year Survey Results!

PlaceCoach(es)Points
1st Benjamin Hendy 48
=2nd Pete Conaghan29
=2nd Max Cubberley29
4th David Slater 18
5th James Goodson (& Mat Ward) 11
6thChris Braithwaite6
7th Ian Kulkowski (& Jay Kelly) 4
8th Ben Archer2
9thNeil Hawke2
10th Geoffrey Manboob 1

1st Place – Benjamin Hendy – Dynablaster Bombermen

Scored the most, won the most.

Quality roster building. Finally getting the rewards due.

Nothing

Solid management as ever but this year he’s a cut above the rest.

Looked the best team pretty much all year. Solid

When I came into this season I had essentially decided I was going to rebuild, get a nice high draft pick, take a WR and go from there. Best laid plans and all that.

Top team. It’s especially impressive given that two of his highest paid players (Green) and Johnson haven’t lived up to expectations.

Superb

Finally it’s all come together.

could this be his year? he only created the league to stroke his own ego, so hopefully not.

=2nd Place – Pete Conaghan – East Flanders Dungeoneers

Another great season for Pete. Can he be the first repeat champion and the leagues first dynasty? Probably not.

Well done, Pete. Solid again.

I think he’s been a bit unlucky – on paper, I think he’s got the best team

Nothing

A solid defense from the champ. Some questionable trades as usual

going for a repeat!

Another team that faded down the stretch, but held on enough to clinch the division. Only one previous title winner has made it back to the playoffs the next year – the Dungeoneers are the second – so that’s an achievement. The Omen is that the previous team to do it (the 13-0 Hards) were knocked out unceremoniously in the first round of the playoffs. Will it happen again?

No

Superb

A proper contender if a little lucky with the schedule. Despite the bad luck with FA deals (Brown and Gordon). Heading for a rocky offseason, with all but 4 of the D set for extension or FA, along with over half of the RB corps and no 1st round pick again. WR is well-set, but with back-loaded money for Hopkins, Adams and Antonio Brown, over 220 dollars on the cap is committed to these for each of the next three years. Add in Cooper and Watson and it’s well over 300, which means that this team cannot afford injury/inconsistency to creep in or the future looks bleak.

=2nd Place – Max Cubberley – Champions of the Sun

Rebuild went well

Nothing

Needs to win it all though as nobody has more players due for extension or free agency. It’s win or bust.

built a team for the regular season

Tempting as it is I will give myself 0

Started like a train. Solid roster from top to bottom

Max is consistently good and probably should’ve done better this season.

Started off at an electric pace and fell away in the last few weeks. I hope he shoves it down TT’s throats if he gets the chance.

Nope

Strong throughout.

Remarkable season really – won by 50 or lost by 50. I think this team is basically as good as Ben’s.

4th Place – David Slater – Dynasore Losers

fucked it, should have been his year

Unlucky not to make the playoffs in my opinion.

Nothing

Fantastic end. Carried a bit by a couple of players

The best.

Looked like a potential championship roster but never got them going. Zero points for attempting a loan

The third top scorer and very unlucky to miss out on a playoff spot. Would he have got there with Rusty? It doesn’t matter, because we don’t do loans. Something which will cast a shadow over this season until at least the end of December. (Also I don’t think it would have made any difference anyway).

Some good FA additions that haven’t quite panned out this year. I think his team will be recent next year

Some canny moves and seeing some success after a while in the dark.

I assume he will tell us how to reshape the league once the season is over so he can finally get his hands on the Owl.

Looking good going forward, the burst came too late this year

5th Place – James Goodson (and Mat Ward?) – Tamworth Two

Only outscored three abject teams and yet made the playoffs. They are the Brees in 2014. Destined to make the final and stink the place out.

I’m surprised he made it to the playoffs. I just don’t think his team is very good.

Not really sure how Goody and Mat made the playoffs. I respect the hustle though.

Nothing

No

They say it’s better to be lucky than good. But when you get to the playoffs, it’s better to be good.

Hopefully their mouthing off will come back to haunt them.

Made the playoffs when had no right so deserves some plaudits

Amazing

Playoffs again! With that squad!

6th Place – Chris Braithwaite – Dyna Hard (or whatever the fuck he’s calling his team now)

What happened?

Being 3rd top scorer means nothing if you don’t do it in the big moments

Nothing

From 13-0 to 3-10, clearly lost the dressing room by harking back to a better time instead of fixing the immediate problems. Should probably be fined draft picks.

He’s very handsome

Started off very strongly but the luck of the schedule was not on his side. Fell away a bit at the end of the season after trading some key parts, which isn’t to be knocked really, sensible to strengthen for next year.

Well positioned for the rebuild to have instant success

Scored well but no luck with the matchups shame

Unlucky

Arguably the best GM over the first 6 seasons.

7th Place – Ian Kulkowski (and Jay Kelly?) – Kelkowski Don’t Play By No Dyna Rules

Mediocre. Basically what I usually am.

Better than you would have thought.

Seem to be a good pair of managers.

Unfortunate to start so poorly. Derrick Henry can fuck off.

Paid for the slow start. The rebuild is working though

Nothing

Nope

No

None

Inspirational commentary there. Well done everyone.

=8th Place – Ben Archer – Here Comes The Brees

I love you, Ben, but no.

Awful

Nothing

Irrelevant

Is it possible to give minus points?

in a great position to fuck up the no1 and 2 picks next year. rest of the season was a write off

His team is bad and seemingly getting worse

He’s been very unlucky, but been canny to get ahead of the next draft. He’s a clever cookie that one.

Getting worse all the time

The point is for beating Slatz in week 13. Otherwise it’s been a miserable season for the Brees. AKA business as usual.

=8th Place – Neil Hawke – Hawkesville Hurricanes

made the best trades of the year

The Cowboys of the Dynabowl – always believing they can win it all, even when a year off to clear cap space and accumulate draft picks would be the better bet. Now low on picks for 2020 and low on cap space too. Will next season be the rebuild year or will they push again and mortgage the future?

WW demons

Not much to say, this is a weirdly constructed roster with a lot of holes and only a couple of nice rookie deals. The Kamara extension is going to blow a hole in the budget.

Neil should get some credit for salvaging a vaguely competitive team from the fire. Credit but no COTY points.

What was Neil thinking trading away all his picks for Brees’ average players!

Nope

Nothing

No

N/A

10th Place – Geoffrey Manboob – The 4th Dynmension: Dynasty of Sadness

Coach of the year in 2017. Rock bottom in 2019. Them’s the breaks.

Worse than bean, which is a shocking thing to say for a team with that much talent. And Phil Rivers.

Somehow made his players play worse than they should have.

Nothing

So much potential but never happened

Perhaps his attention was elsewhere, but what looked promising before the season started has not ended that way. You’d like to think it was at least poor team selection but the second worst perfect points suggests not. A roster that looks good on paper but wasn’t in real life. Perhaps they could have won it all 3 years ago.

Nope

No

Hang in there

A disappointing season again, but at least not down with the dregs. Unlucky more than inept.

The NFL season

What was the highest high of the 2019 NFL season? (Not to be confused with Josh Gordon’s highest high)

Well, what a bunch of cheerful, upbeat, positive folks you are…

None really spring to mind tbh

Just before the season started

Haven’t been watching much this year, sorry 🙁

Still, at least some of you have found a team to entertain you this season…

The Miami Dolphins TD pass from the punter to the kicker

Miami’s amazing trick play

Dolphins failure to tank

But there have been some real, prolonged highs too…

Two things for me. Jackson at the Ravens and their ability to grind out down after down after down. Secondly, Shananananahahanas 49ers offence has been great to watch.

Lamar Jackson. All of him. Also, Mason Rudolph getting smacked. Gardner Minshew

Everything about Gardner Minshew

And also there was this…

Tuttle stiff arm on Ryan

And what was the lowest low of the season?

Someone had this as a high, but each to their own…

The Rudolph Garrett fight

A little bit of Homerism…

Brees injury

Rams v Ravens

Some more serious answers…

Dodge refereeing

The Kaepernick crap

Luke Falk was the low point. The Kaepernick try-out.

Dolphins blatant tanking

Antonio Brown. Helmets. Frozen feet. What he makes up in being an excellent receiver, he lacks in intelligence

Some more positivity…

As soon as it started

And then someone who’s not overly familiar with how these get put together…

See above

What one thing does the NFL need to change, more than anything else? (And you can relax, I’ve decided not to comment on everything as I’ve just realised how long that will take me. I mean, it was fine when I spread his out over a couple of weeks having got the answers back in a timely fashion, but in one night? That’s ridiculous)

As helpful as ever…

Dunno

Nothing springs to mind

There were some decent answers though (I’m using ‘decent’ loosely)

Pass interference review is the VAR of the NFL.

The arbitrary justice system. AB left hanging this year (probably deservedly so, but it’s not right regardless).

Soft roughing the passer penalties

Goodell

The new PI rules

The Pats constant avoidance of rules.

The scheduling this year has been pretty awful – some OK teams have been taken out of the race (the Browns) by having their schedules so heavily front-loaded. I also think they should scrap home advantage for division winners – sure they can have a playoff game, but it doesn’t need to be a home one.

Replay review

The Refs

Who’s going to be playing in the Superbowl, come February, and which of those teams will win? (This is what we think so bet on anyone else)

As ever, someone has just picked the winner.

KC and San Francisco. I just think Mahomes is a little too good, and though the Ravens are the best team, arguably in all of the NFL, they’ll lose a one-off game if they have to face him.

Patriots beating the 49ers

Pat’s over saints

Ravens 49ers – Ravens win

Ravens Saints

Pats will beat the 49ers because they’re the Pats

Ravens will beat 49ers

Baltimore vs. San Francisco, San Francisco to win

Packers

Ravens over Niners

Onto the Dynabowl…

Who is going to win the Superb Owl? Who will they face in the final?

The people who answered before the finalists were known…

Benjamin over Max

Pete will re-Pete, over Tamworth

Me obviously. I will not have to beat anyone because the other teams will forfeit in terror. [Narrator: he didn’t make the final]

Champions of the Sun beating the Bombermen

And the people who voted after…

Pete, being Benj [Narrator: I don’t know how Pete is going to pull this off]

Ben over Pete

Benj v Pete, with Pete to win

Bombermen! They will face the Dungeoneers

Pete over benj

Da Commish Vs The Reigning champ. Da Commish to win

Dynabowl related best moment

There are two themes running through this. Aside from nihilism.

N/A

TTs 0.3 win over the Losers which ended up securing another play off appearance

Chris’ tears

Ben beating Slatz to take him out of playoff contention

Winning a game with the second lowest score of the week

’13-0′ Chris scoring well but losing. Shame that

beating Slatz to make sure he didnt get into the playoffs

Neil getting under the salary cap

Slatz still missing the playoffs

Seeing Chris’ team collapse

Worst Dynabowl related moment

The loan.

N/A

Nothing comes to mind

My season

90% of the season

Leaving AB out of the side in the only week he was eligible to play, and losing by less than his points total

Watching your player play one series or snap and then being carted off

losing 3 Qbs in 2 weeks

Ben’s team

Attempted Russell Wilson loan and subsequent reversal

Most Valuable Player

Wide receiver Lamar Jackson – 4 votes

Run CMC, Aaron Donald – 2 votes each

Zane Gonzalez, Cameron Jordan Cameron Jordan Cameron – 1 vote each

Rookie of the Year

Nick Bosa, Josh Jacobs – 4 votes

Jake Bailey, AJ brown – 1 vote

Best pre-season free agent signing?

I think they’ve been mostly terrible. There’s far more competition for worst signing.

Logan Ryan because I can’t be bothered to look who anyone else picked up

Antonio Brown

Marvin Jones

none stand out

Don’t know

Tyreek Hill

Ty Johnson, just because Chris managed to turn him into a 1st round pick.

Best in-season free agent signing? I’m still not listing the options – just pick someone

Don’t know

Jordan Phillips

Shaq Barrett

Shaq!

Shaw Barrett [Narrator: Who?]

Shaq Barrett

Wayne Gallman

Mosteart

none stand out

Two years ago, the Sadness were voted the team best set fur future success. Go take a long hard look at yourselves and now reassess… Who’s set up to make the playoffs in 2021. 2022 and 2023?

Losers – 7 (!!!) votes

Hard, Bombermen, Brees – 1 vote each

And what do you think of everyone’s team building?

I think Mike tanked his team to make us look liked idiots on that last question.

Losers have done better than expected, Brees are doing well to gather picks to rebuild

tanking for 3 straight years seems to have worked for slatz!

Bean is really going to have fucked it hard when none of his draft picks work out.

Not much building going on!

Brees need to improve 🙂

Outstanding apart from the Sadness

Slatz’s late run was very impressive

I mean, we’re all shit, really.

Any Other Business?

I’m going to keep banging this drum until you all agree… The Chatterbowl should be an auction rather than draft, right?

Obvs

Naturally

Potatoes [I’m counting this as a win]

Maybe [and this]

No.

Why not do another league with an auction if you’re so desperate

couldnt give a fuck

Oh god please no

Nope

No thanks

So that’s 4 people on board…

Should we Skype the rookie draft next year?

sure

It’s a nice idea. Maybe the first round.

Not adverse to this

No. Who can be arsed with that? I’d do it if I have to but prefer the slow burn.

Nope, would take too long

No

No

No

For 8 hours? That’s a no for me. Logistics permitting, doubt you’ll get this to pass

Definitely not. A slow draft is easier to organise, allows some time for trading and telling people to FUCKING PICK ALREADY, and allows me to keep a shred of dignity with my wife.

As far as I am aware, the following GMs have not procreated yet. Who will be next with a sproglet and Dynabowl Team Heir?

Chris – 7 votes

Slatz – 3 votes

Max – 1 vote

[Someone voted for two people, which I didn’t realise was possible]

What is the most quintessentially 80s song?

Take on Me – Aha [I thought it was this until someone pointed out the right answer, which is one of those below. One that no one else went for. So not I’ve Been Losing You]

Come on Eileen, Dexy’s Midnight Runners. First single I ever owned.

A-ha – I’ve Been Losing You

Jump by Van Halen

Smooth operator – just for that Sax

St Elmo’s Fire – John Parr

Never Gonna Give You Up – Astley

Safety Dance – Men In Hats

I’ve been losing you – a-ha

New Order Blue Monday

It’s 20 years ago so now we can properly assess – what was the best film of 1999?

One of you is very wrong. Very wrong indeed… [Check here and here]

Hoo boy that was a bad year. I’m gonna go with Deuce Big… I’m actually gonna take Blair Witch

Fight Club

The Matrix

Jack of Hearts

Fight Club or The Phantom Menace [And another of you is even wronger]

Being John Malkovich

Magnolia is one of my favourite ever films, so this is a no brainer for me.

Project over Fight Club; more evidence of my extremely poor judgement.

Election

The Matrix

im not allowed to talk about it, its a rule

Any questions I should have asked but didn’t?

Nope

No

No

Yes

Which pair of coaches would make the best couple?

Why is this happening?

Is it time to expand the Dynabowl?

If you could punch any animal, which one would it be?

How would you rate the dynabowl experience?

nothing its perfect as is