Yes, I said pass catchers. Mostly because the TEs aren’t worth an article of their own. Strap yourself in, this is going to be a long one…

Corey Coleman – High 1st Round – OK, let’s start with the elephant in the room. Yes, he is a Cleveland Brown. Yes, they will struggle to win more than 4 games this year. And no, none of this matters. RG3 is the best QB Cleveland have ever had. I’m not even joking, look it up. Cleveland have only ever had two QBs with over a 100 passer rating for the season – neither started a game and the second of them finished the season 1 for 1 for 8 yards. Josh McCown’s 2015 half-season is basically the best anyone’s ever properly played the position for Cleveland. If you exclude players who didn’t start a game, RG3’s truncated, disastrous, worst-of-his-career 2014 campaign would be the 4th best performance in reborn Cleveland’s history (two of those only started two games). I’ve watched Jay Gruden’s and Hue Jackson’s Bengals and while I’m not as enamoured of Jackson as some, there’s no doubt Jackson runs a better offence that works to the strengths of his players. I’m genuinely excited to see if he can turn around RG3’s career. But you know what… it doesn’t entirely matter if he doesn’t. Cleveland still produces notable fantasy players – Travis Benjamin, Josh Gordon and Gary Barnidge have all had decent returns with awful quarterbacks. Coleman is small, but he elevates well and he’s got quick hands. He’s rapid, with impressive acceleration and a good range of moves. He won’t likely bulk up, Baylor offensive products haven’t generally translated to the NFL particularly well, and he could do to cut out some of the drops that have plagued him, but he compares nicely with someone like Emmanuel Sanders and he won’t have to share the field with someone like Demaryius Thomas or Antonio Brown unless Josh Gordon makes a triumphant return. I like a lot of what the Browns did in this draft, and Coleman is a big part of that.

Will Fuller – Low 1st Round – As you might have noticed in the RB one, I’ve been trying to work in draft order, so Fuller goes next. Was Fuller worth a mid-1st pick? I wouldn’t say so. Is he a player worth owning? I wouldn’t say so. This pick, the whole draft in fact, suggests Houston aren’t enamoured with Jaelen Strong and that they want to invest in speed over all else. Hopkins proves (much as the point above) that talent can overcome even the worst of quarterbacking situations, and Osweiler is more unknown than terrible, but will have to struggle terribly to not be an improvement over last year’s Hoyer et al mess (statistically, Brandon Weeden was the best QB in Houston and Dallas last year). The question is more whether Fuller has the talent. At Notre Dame he showed explosive speed, and he attacks the ball well, and he’s good at drawing contact from defenders by putting himself in the right spot. The problem is that he’s very likely to lose those battles. He was shoved around fairly easily by college DBs, the NFL ones will flatten him. And his hands are not great. He might lose a size-off with Teddy Tiny Hands, and as a result he tends to body catch, which a lot of drops as a result. For every highlight catch he has on film, there’s at least one highlight drop. What separates the elite receivers in recent years isn’t speed, or athleticism – it’s the combination of speed and jump with the ball-handling skills to make catches when extended, to secure the ball under pressure. Fuller isn’t that guy and he’s not going to be much more than a boom or bust downfield threat in an offence that will run the ball a lot, and throw it to Hopkins at every chance.

Josh Doctson – High 1st Round – What stands out most about Doctson is his catch radius. He has the hands I talked about above in discussing Fuller, and the ability to make the sort of circus catches on bad throws that make QBs love you. You’ll also find it near impossible to find anyone willing to talk down his attitude or work-ethic. He doesn’t have the speed or ability to take the top off of a defence like Fuller or Coleman, but he runs hard. He does lack power, and he doesn’t really have a frame to suggest he’ll add it. And there’s that surgically repaired wrist that ended his season early. But perhaps the worst habit Doctson has is that he’s not strong over the middle. He tends to lose focus on the ball, instead watching the safety and making bad drops as a result. There’s a lot of plays go in that direction and unless he fixes that, it’s going to be unlikely he gets looked for on them. Doctson is in a relatively favourable position, with Garcon and Jackson out of contract, and no particular reason why Washington would bring them back, but it could be 2017 before he offers more than a glimpse.

Laquon Treadwell – High 1st Round – I think it’s pretty clear I love Treadwell – a 5 star recruit out of high school and a record-breaking receiver at Ole Miss. He’s going to go up and win the ball if it’s there to be won, and he is another, like Doctson, who will catch it if it’s there to be caught. He doesn’t have elite speed, but he’s not as slow as is sometimes made out. More importantly, he’s a clear number one in the Minnesota offence. Diggs will take the top off and make big plays, but Treadwell will be the go to guy, in the red zone (when not AP) or on medium to long third downs. He’s capable of turning screens into big gains and he thrives on contact, before and after the catch and particularly as a blocker. I’ve seen comparisons to Dez Bryant, but Bryant’s a mouthy fucker and I get the impression he’s more respected for what he can do than liked for who he is, so I’m going to go one better: Larry Fitzgerald. Treadwell is a quiet leader, highly respected in the locker room, and he’s a good fit for the Vikings in that sense. Whether he will end up quite the receiver these two are/were is a different question, but the similarities – outstanding hands, the ability to win the contested catches and to win the physical battles both in the air and on the ground should not be doubted, and the lack of top speed is perhaps not too important when you’ve noodle-arm throwing you the ball and Stefon Diggs on the other half of the field.

Sterling Shepherd – 1st / 2nd Round – A quick, shifty receiver who put up good numbers for OSU, Shepherd fits nicely in New York’s pass first offence as a number two to OBJ. Shepherd is small, and easily pushed around, but when he can get a clean release, he’s basically a cornerback’s nightmare – he easily changes direction, can create clean throwing lanes for his QB and will turn quick slants or a yard of separation into a big gain. His hands are about average. He’s soft to the ball, so doesn’t drop many, but doesn’t have the elastic catch radius and ability to catch everything that Doctson or Treadwell do. If a lot of this sounds like what you read about Cooks a couple of years back, that’s not a surprise. He’s not going to be as good as Cooks – who’s a bit more physical, despite his size – but there’s a lot to like. If he can avoid getting pressed out of games by physical corners, he’s an upgrade on whatever the Giants have had at #2 for quite a while, and could be a top 20ish receiver, but that’s a pretty crowded field with a lot of guys separated by a small number of points and it’s more likely he averages out somewhere around a WR3 or 4.

Michael Thomas – 2nd Round – I think Thomas probably goes in the 1st, but give me a second here. Don’t be fooled, New Orleans is a pass-first team and probably is when Brees moves on, but it’s not necessarily a great spot for a receiver. It’s a pass-first team with a lot of options. Only Brandin Cooks broke the 1k mark last year, with Snead putting up 900 and Colston, Ingram and Coleman also getting reasonable yardage. All of which means… It’s good to own Drew Brees and his 5,000 yards. But it’s not so great to own his targets – with the exception of Ingram and the TE. There’s simply too many passes spread between too many targets. Thomas simply slots in where Colston was, and that’s probably around the 600-800 yards mark with 4-5 touchdowns. There’s nothing particularly exceptional about Thomas, and little to get excited about. He’s a good size – 6’3 and 212 – so he’s going to do well against physical corners, but he’s not exceptionally quick, and you’re not going to get excited about his ball-handling skills (no sniggering back there). He’s probably the best route runner of the wide receivers mentioned so far – most of the rest ran limited route trees in college – but he’s also one of the least-worked. Ohio has a lot of players and spreads it around a lot when they’re not simply pounding it on the ground with QB or RB. I have Thomas down as a low ceiling player who’s not consistently going to be a top 30 receiver, and I’d not spend a first rounder on a player who could be an occasional flex or bye week cover.

Tyler Boyd – 1st / 2nd Round – Boyd is almost the exact opposite of Thomas. There’s a real dearth of options for the Bengals, and I’d suggest he plugs straight in as the second option, behind AJ Green – much like Sterling Shepherd in New York. Boyd mostly worked shorter routes, and projects as a slot receiver in the NFL. I could talk about how he broke Larry Fitzgerald’s (him again!) records for freshmen receivers at Pitt, but that massively oversells his ability. Boyd is a lovely mover – he’s quick, with fast-twitch acceleration and easy changes of direction, and along with Treadwell and Doctson, he’s one of the best ball-catchers in the class. He’s not Treadwell, but his hands are strong, and his catch radius is way bigger than it has any right to be thanks to a frankly absurd acrobatic / contortionist type of body control. So why isn’t he the best receiver in the class? At the combine he weighed in at 197. I’m assuming he wore a lead lined suit. He’s not just thin, he’s skinny. He’s not winning in the tackle. Hell, he’ll do well to survive his first decent hit. He will struggle in traffic, and unsurprisingly, he has had problems with drops as he tends to flinch at the sound of footsteps. He’s also had ball security issues, perhaps because his lack of functional strength makes the ball quite heavy to him. Boyd is a bit of a boom/bust candidate – there’s so much to like about his movement and freakish acrobatic skills, and he’s a good competitor. But unless he can find a way to overcome his lack of strength, he could find himself limited to gimmicky plays, in other words he could end up anywhere from Jarvis Landry to Cor!Darelle Patterson. One other concern – he got himself suspended for a DUI in college.

Braxton Miller – 6th Round – I know someone will take him before this, bigger fool them. Miller joins a receiving corps with Strong, Hopkins and Fuller – so in theory he could end up being the #2. But what does he offer exactly? Well, he performed well at the combine. Not exceptional, but one of the better players in the class. And that’s it. He has 26 career catches in college, as injury ruined his shoulder and forced a conversion from QB to WR, and none of note. So what can you learn from that? Bugger all. A total gamble by the Texans, and by anyone who drafts him. I don’t know anyone who had him as anything other than a late round flier, and I know I’ve consistently trashed the Texans draft class, but this was the shit cherry on top of the shit sandwich – a reach of the worst kind. I’d love to see Miller succeed – a former #1 prospect out of high school who had his QB hopes ruined by injury – he’d be a great story. But 5,000-1 shots don’t happen all the time and Leicester already stole his chance.

Leontee Caroo – 3rd Round – OK, he’s got a great name. And he’s a physical receiver who put up good numbers for the Big 10, and played bigger than his 6’0 frame suggested. But he’s gone to Miami where there’s already Parker, Stills and Landry, so he’s not exactly going to see a lot of chances initially, if at all. And he served a two game suspension for being the sort of cunt who gets arrested for hitting a woman. Fuck him and his magnificent name. You draft him and you’re a cunt too.

The Rest – I’d start with MoBo, but it’s more fun to keep Jay waiting. Chris Moore (4th) is another deep threat receiver for the Ravens. In case Mike Wallace is still shit, and Perriman is actually a total bust. At best he’s a Torrey Smith type boom-bust receiver who might crack the top 20. A proper burner though, with the ability to win at the line and run away from defenders. Malcolm Mitchell (3rd) is a prototypical Belichick pick – a former 5 star recruit who’s suffered a string of injuries to drop off the radar – the talent is there and he has everything to be as good as anyone in this whole class. He can win the physical battles, has great hands and terrific speed and he comes out of a programme with an NFL style offense, so should transition well. If he can stay fit. Ricardo Louis (7th) was a bit of a reach by Cleveland in the 4th, he’s a development project, who flashed the ability to make impressive catches, and also to make simple catches look much harder than they really were. Pharoh Cooper (5th) is a bit of a do-everything weapon, on a team who already have one in Tavon Austin and don’t really know what to do with him. Demarcus Robinson (4th) took a lot of drugs and picked a lot of fights. I’ve seen Justified. No way is Kansas a bad fit for him, no drugs or fighting there. No sir. As a receiver – he’s got the right sort of natural size and shape for it, and good hands, he’s quick and he’s a tough one to chase down. He’s capable of breaking tackles, and won’t be brought down by arm tackling. Of course, just standing in his way is going to be enough, as he generally avoids tackling like the plague, and will probably turn and run for the nearest sideline. If Andy Reid can instil a set of balls in him (and keep him off the reefer) he could be alright.

Look, there’s fucking loads of these guys, and I’m not doing them all. Who cares about Tyreek Hill or Seth DeValve really, anyway? You shouldn’t be drafting either of them. So, the last four receivers – Rashard Higgins (4th) is worth drafting for his hair alone. I’m not suggesting you draft anyone just for their hair though – that way lies chaos. Higgins was the best receiver in college in 2015 with Garret Grayson throwing him balls and earned a consensus All-American pick for his work. He’s a polished route-runner who’s very efficient in his movement and without having standout skills in any particular area, puts up startling production and always seems to find a clean lane for his QB to put the ball in. He could be a real surprise, and unlike Ricardo Louis or Seth DeValve, he could be the second good receiver in this class for Cleveland. Mortiz Bohringer (undrafted) unlike the NFL, he doesn’t get the umlaut from me because I can’t remember how to do it. Could easily be cut by the end of training camp – he’s a physical specimen at 6’4 227lbs and deceptively quick for a big man, with a big catch radius. But he’s not actually ready for the NFL as a receiver. Most likely he’s a draft and stash for two years and then cut sort of player. If he survives with the Vikings. I just don’t see a ceiling for him where he’s worth a pick. Kolby Listenbee (6th) will need to develop into a fantasy relevant NFL receiver. He is a former track All-American, and ran a very limited number of routes in college. There’s skills there – he attacks the ball well, has a good jump, good hands and obviously ridiculous speed and acceleration, but until he learns to do more than just race downfield he’s going to be very limited as a fantasy option. It’s not clear he has much room to bulk up either – and he doesn’t look likely to survive being hit by some very big, very strong men. The Other Michael Thomas (4th) another speedy, skinny receiver with durability concerns. This one however can catch the ball, ran a lot of routes and got good production for Southern Miss. Tends to flinch from contact and drops the ball as a result when he shouldn’t, he’s a better bet than most of the guys I’ve mentioned here.

Hunter Henry – 1st Round – Probably not a first round pick in other years, but this class isn’t that strong. Henry is probably the best TE prospect I’ve seen in ages. Fuck the rest, this guy is a stud. 90 targets, 2 drops. He’s a perfect fit for what Whiz and Rivers like to do in San Diego, and unlike a lot of TEs he could be effective in 2TE sets as a pass catcher in his rookie year. He’s not going to be a Gronk style do-everything stud, but he’s a proper tight end, not a receiver pretending he can block like Eifert or Reed. And he’s not got the same issues with durable. A first might be a reach, but then a lot of those in the second half of the first round are. Why not reach for the one player with the potential to be a proper talent at his position, rather than another mediocre bench receiver?

Rico Gathers – 3rd/4th Round – There’s a lot of reasons not to make this pick – he’s never played football properly (pretty much the same as MoBo there then). But basketball tight ends are a thing and there’s fewer more basketball-y than a guy who only played basketball and never suited up for a game of football in college. Gathers is a total gamble pick, but these guys when they work out are the ones you want – Eifert, Reed, Graham. And he’ll have time to develop and learn from a genuine great at the position in Dallas.

Austin Hooper – 5th Round – Hard to get over-excited about any of the other Tight Ends, but Stanford have 6 former players at the position in the NFL, so Hooper should stick around. He’ll need a year or two to learn the position properly and he was often the last guy on the line to move at the snap, which would be a problem against NFL defenders. Probably just another mediocre tight end. And he’s a Falcon – so he’s guaranteed to be shit – the new Levine Toilolo.

Nick Vannett – Undrafted – Don’t bother. He’s a good tight end, he blocks and plays well in the run game, but he’s not a fantasy relevant player and never will be.

Tyler Higbee – 4th Round – He’s a Ram, so he’ll be shit. And he’s not as excellently named as the Rams’ other TE prospect (Temarrick Hemingway), but Higbee could be the other fantasy relevant TE in this draft if you’re willing to look past the whole Rams thing. He’s a converted wide receiver so he runs routes well and has the ability to separate, make catches under pressure and in traffic. However, unexpectedly, he’s also a pretty good blocker, and he does his job in the running game too. That makes him an every down sort of player who can release and make catches. Might take some time to develop at NFL level, but he’s a sneaky good pick and stash. [Ed: Of course, he’s (allegedly) a violent racist hick so, you know, factor that in, or don’t, when you think about picking him]

So, quarterbacks in the bag. Not very exciting as a group. What about the running backs?

Ezekiel Elliot – #1 Pick – What’s the point in writing much, the only way he doesn’t go #1 is if Neil locks Mangboob into a lead-lined bunker just before the draft starts. His value is mostly tied to his situation – the Cowboys running game is strong – and the fact he was the best back in the draft. It’s pretty much a fantasy can’t miss, and in a redraft league Elliot should be a first round pick. As an actual running back… Hmmm. Don’t let the hype and presumptive top fantasy pick distract you, nor the fact the Cowboys massively over-drafted him. He’s a three down back thanks to his blocking skills, he can break tackles at the second level and has good initial speed. He’s not a particularly good receiving back however – 1 td in three years at Ohio – and compared with some of the studs coming out in 2017 (Fournette, Cook, McCaffrey headline that group), Elliot is simply OK. He has an appetite for the big game though, showing up big throughout last year’s college football playoff (although not against Michigan State in the fatal game for the Buckeyes in 2015). Of course, that won’t count for much in Dallas, where big games are an occasional treat, rather than a regular occurrence. Lastly, there’s some minor concerns, he almost certainly did the kind of substances which can get a player in trouble in the NFL while at Ohio, his average carry has gone down each year in college and Dallas chucked a bit of money at Alfred Morris. It’s not clear if there was much of a market for Morris, and if you intended to draft Elliot (almost certainly without competition for him since you’re picking 4th) then why would a cap-strapped team chuck money at another running back, instead of at the awful defence. That suggest Morris will get a good amount of touches too, and conceivably he could be a goal-line back, meaning the value of both is hurt.

Derrick Henry – 1st Round – Almost the inverse of Elliot, Henry is in an awful situation with the Titans. He’s a very north-south back, who basically doesn’t catch the ball. He’s a tough prospect to project – an unusual size and shape, with long legs and a long torso, and a lack of great acceleration. Unlike Elliot, Henry was only a one-year starter at Alabama, but across a year as a back up and a year as a starter he still managed to rack up more carries than Elliot. So why is Henry the second best back in fantasy terms? He’s a workhorse, despite having the frame to get brought down by tacklers, he hasn’t been particularly easily. And he runs hard for 60 minutes. In fact, he seems to get stronger as the game goes on. He might not have a ton of acceleration, but that doesn’t mean he’s slow. He is incredibly patient behind the line, and when he sees the gap, he hits it – hard and if he breaks a tackle, he’s hard to chase down. Murray probably isn’t going to be a long-term solution in Tennessee, but unlike Dallas, where Morris is almost certainly a number two back who will work the goal-line, Murray is probably the number one – at least for now – and Henry will get the goal-line touches. On some teams, that’s a useful thing to be. On the Titans, that’s a fairly niche role.

Kenyan Drake – 4th Round – There’s no real clarity over the Miami backfield. They didn’t offer Miller enough, so he’s gone to Houston, they tried to pay CJ Anderson too much and Denver saved them from it. In fact, they did everything to suggest Jay Ajayi wasn’t their guy. Then they drafted Derrick Henry’s back-up. A receiving back not an every-down work horse, he has value unless (or until) Miami pick up a free agent back (Arian Foster?), simply because Jay Ajayi’s knees are not the safest thing to gamble on. The problem for Drake is that until Ajayi gets hurt, he’s got virtually no value. Gase is an excellent offensive co-ordinator, and in Tannehill, Stills and Parker they have a good set of weapons in the passing game – and on top of that, there’s Jarvis Landry, who kind of already fills the role of receiving back, as well as wide receiver. A necessary handcuff for Ajayi, rather than a worthwhile piece on his own at this point.

CJ Prosise & Alex Collins – 2nd Round & 4th Round – So Marshawn Lynch retires and now seems to be a great moment to own Thomas Rawls, who averaged 5.6ypc in 2015. And then the draft happens and the Seahawks muddy the waters by drafting Prosise, Alex Collins and Zac Brooks. Perhaps Collins was simply too good to resist at the back end of the 5th round – some draft guides had him as high as a third round prospect – and I don’t understand why there was so little love for either of the two big Arkansas (5-3 in the SEC) products in this year’s draft. Collins is a former #1 recruit out of high school, who won the SEC freshman of the year award and had back-to-back 1,000 yard seasons despite being the back-up in the first of those seasons. So why a fourth rounder? Because he’s the one competing with Rawls. Lynch was under-rated for his ability to make yards after contact, and Seattle’s offensive line is more offensive than most. Collins is a patient back, who’ll take what’s offered. He doesn’t however do much after contact, and he doesn’t have breakaway pace and behind that line he could struggle to break T-Rich type averages. I can only assume there’s some concerns about Rawls coming back from his fractured ankle, or perhaps his ability to be an every down back for Seattle as it seems a strange fit and an unnecessary pick. Prosise on the other hand is a receiving back who runs well too, he’s shifty, with both speed and acceleration. He’s played both safety and wide receiver in college, but picked up the running back position quickly and has plenty of room to develop, which is good, as he flirts with the line between patience and indecision at times. He’s not an every down back, his blocking definitely needs work, and – like Collins – he has issues with ball security. If there’s genuinely a concern with Rawls, Prosise is probably the guy who gets most of the touches.

Tyler Ervin – 6th Round – Nobody will be shocked to hear Ervin is a bit of a reach as a 4th rounder. He’s small, and he’s not going to grow. The Texans whole draft seemed to be based on the old Oakland approach of drafting speed over anything else. Ervin is not just fast, he’s rapid and he accelerates in a blink. Which is great, but his brain doesn’t run as quick as his feet – even a hint of a gap and he’ll race at it – which sometimes leads to him running into his own blockers. He’s a boom and bust runner, who’s unimpressive average is inflated by big plays. Since the Texans just handed Lamar Miller a big contract, don’t expect Ervin to do much more than frustrate you on your bench when he rips off a 60 yard touchdown play, before frustrating you all over again the following week when he doesn’t even get a touch, or loses 1 yard on his only carry when you stick him in the team.

Kenneth Dixon – 2nd Round – Some mocks have got a little over-excited about Dixon. Let’s deal with this in order then. Dixon is a patient back with good feet who can dodge tacklers, he’s a good blocker and he has good hands and has run well after catching the ball, which serves to make him a potential three down back. However he can also waste time going east-west behind the line, he has little acceleration and he is a little one-paced. Mostly though, the Ravens isn’t a great landing spot. Firstly, the thinking seems to be that the Ravens will make Dixon the lead back because the running game struggled last year and he’s the one to fix it. The Ravens running game didn’t flounder though, these simply aren’t your Ravens of five years ago. It ranked 26th in terms of yardage because it ranked 26th in terms of attempts. Trestman’s offence will always look to pass first, and the two running backs (Forsett and Allen) both ended the year with respectable, if not stellar numbers for the amount of work they did. Dixon isn’t Ray Rice, he’s not going to take over this team and turn them back into a top ten running offence. In fact, he’s unlikely to be anything more than a third option. And as long as the Ravens secondary keeps putting the team in holes they need to throw their way out of, it’s not going to matter anyway. So why a second? Because some idiot is going to waste a high pick on him. If you’re interested, this is the latest you’ll get him, and as much as a low first is probably going to be spent on him. It’s not a deep or a talented class, and Dixon’s supposed ceiling makes him appealing. Just beware, the floor is very low too.

Devontae Booker – 2nd Round – Last of the major players I’m going to bother writing up. Booker’s a talented player, with as high as a second round grade who fell to the bottom of the 4th because of a combination of his age, work-load and the torn meniscus which ended his season. Much like the Texans reaching because of someone’s speed, the Broncos getting a high value guy on the cheap should come as no surprise. Booker’s a little over-worked with four years of college play, and that should be a concern, but he’s an all-round threat who’s very good catching the ball out of the backfield, as well as getting through holes and getting chunks of yardage. He lacks big play ability and will likely get caught from behind. If NFL history has taught us one thing it’s that Cleveland will suck. If it’s taught us two things, it’s that Broncos mid and late round running backs are always worth keeping an eye on. Anderson doesn’t seem a great fit for the zone-blocking scheme Kubiak uses, and Booker could easily end up the lead back in Denver by the end of the year (if he keeps hold of the ball), as his ability to break tackles, run hard and get every inch will likely make him popular with coaches and team mates.

The Rest – Paul Perkins (2nd) is probably the pick of the rest. The Giants running back situation has always been a bit of a mess, but with Tom Coughlin finally shuffling off, perhaps there’s a chance for a lead back to emerge. Perkins is the likeliest candidate, a two year starter (and a solid back up) at UCLA, who can catch – although isn’t the best at it – as well as run he’s a candidate to play at least two out of three downs regularly (don’t expect him to block, he’s willing, but unlikely to be much more than a speed bump). Jordan Howard (2nd/3rd) gives the Bears a proper running back, not a speedster who can catch the ball and run away if he finds space. He can block, but it’s a bit like throwing himself in front of a moving car in the hope of stopping it, rather than expectation. Durability and a slate of injuries would be a concern, but fit, he’s almost certainly getting more reps than Langford as he’s a genuine talent – he’s elusive, he has good vision and patience to follow his blocks and is not easy to bring down. DeAndre Washington (3rd Round) has a shot of being a starter. That’s because he’s in Oakland and there’s no standout back there, rather than because he is a prototypical bell cow running back. He’s not a tough runner who’ll break tackles, nor a prototypical size or shape, yet he gets yards. And he does it because he’s a smooth runner, who can slip by tacklers with deceptive burst of speed and surprising agility. In space he’s a real threat and he could be a very effective option for Carr on screen plays. He’s an effective blocker too, which makes him an interesting proposition and a potential to play a lot of downs. Wendell Smallwood (5th Round) is an elusive ‘tweener back. A natural replacement for Darren Sproles in the Philadelphia offence, rather than an every down back or a starter, he has speed and the home run ability that Sproles has provided so ably in Philly, New Orleans and San Diego. A potential flex player, particularly in bye weeks. Jonathan Williams (7th round) is probably not much more than an after-thought right now, as the Bills are well set. He was the main back ahead of Alex Collins for Arkansas prior to a foot injury that wiped out his 2015, so there’s some talent there. Not much though and almost certainly not enough to get regular touches for the Bills.

Hello,

It’s that time of year when everyone wants to do a mock draft, but I’m going to skip that and instead simply look through the top prospects at each position and suggest the sort of round they’d be worth picking in. So without much ado, this year’s QB class.

Jared Goff – 4th or 5th round – Where else to start, but with the #1 overall pick? Goff is… awkward. He’s got a good arm, and he flashes all the throws. He set a bunch of PAC-12 records. And yet… Cal sucked. That’s not entirely on him, but he basically comes out of college with a lot of meaningless yards, losing records in divisional play and no win against ranked opposition. A bowl victory against Air Force – the worst of the three armed forces teams (and none of them are good) – doesn’t add a lot of gloss. And while some of his stats (over the 60% completion mark each year) suggest he’ll be OK, compare him to Winston, Mariota, RG3, Luck (and the Ram’s last #1 pick, Bradford) and he’s clearly at least a cut below their standard. His PER was 20-30 points lower in his best season, his completion percentage 5-6% less, and his YPA much lower. And most of those guys didn’t play in Air Raid (spread offences) which serve to inflate a QB’s numbers. Most of all though, the biggest reason to hate Goff in fantasy is the Rams. Have they had a top 30 QB in the last decade? When was Jeff Fisher last in charge of a good passing offence? And where are the weapons – it’s not like there’s a first rounder next year to find them either. When it’s a positive the coach might get fired and the player might have to go through learning a whole new offence in his 2nd or 3rd year then you’re very much in troubled waters. At best Goff projects as an average QB, in a below-average offence. Draft at your peril.

Carson Wentz – 5th round – OK, so some people are impressed by his ability to read protections and switch to the run – a Centre does this in the NFL. Colour me unimpressed, I wouldn’t draft a receiver because he had a good average punt distance (although I would love him more than the rest for it). Wentz took over under centre on a team who won three FCS national championships on the back of a great defence and running game before he took over the job, and were described by some as the best FCS team in history. So far, so knock-off Alabama. Yet, nobody was creaming themselves at the thought of drafting Jake Coker, or AJ McCarron. Because they’re shit. Wentz was injured this year and played less than half of the season, and you can play a game of spot the difference when his replacement (Easton Stick – great name) came in:

And that’s the major concern. Ignore all the crap about reading defences etc, Wentz was no better than a back up FCS QB. I mentioned how Goff compared very unfavourably with a lot of recent top picks, there’s one he compares very favourable with – Carson Wentz. So why have a I given Wentz a similar pick to Goff? Because Goff is a better QB in a much, much worse situation. Wentz joins a rookie HC, with a very good reputation for developing and working with QBs on a team who will actually give him a shot to succeed. The fact Bradford and Chase Daniel are there muddies the waters a little, but ultimately, it’s not a bad spot to be a QB in. He’s a likely bust, but as a flier, his ceiling is higher than anyone who’s hopes and dreams get crushed by Jeff Fisher.

Paxton Lynch – Late 2nd Round – Perhaps a year from being NFL ready, and may well not be given that year, but the Broncos is a great spot to land and I have always felt Lynch was the best QB and in a couple of years there’s a good chance there’ll be questions asked about why teams with a clear need passed on the best passer in the draft. There’s some unfavourable stuff about him being a bit spacey floating round from scouts and the combine, but someone downgraded Eli Apple because he couldn’t cook and we’ve seen examples of the sorts of stupid questions that are asked, so take anything you hear from the combine with a pinch of salt. Lynch is a giant, with a good arm, but what I like most about Lynch is that he doesn’t rely on athleticism, he is elusive in the pocket (reminds me of Aaron Rodgers), and when it breaks down he keeps his eyes downfield finds space, sets and throws. He’s actually the most accurate of the main three passers (66.8%), and while he has shown a tendency to miss the odd throw that might get him in trouble in the NFL, he finished his Junior year with nearly 4,000 yards at 8.5ypa, 28 tds and only 4 interceptions with a reasonable 157.5 efficiency rating. Thems mighty fine numbers. Go on, you know you want to. And if you’re not convinced, go look at the Memphis-Ole Miss game, it’s not polished, but there’s a lot to like – especially considering it came against such a fine defence, who consistently got pressure to him.

Cody Kessler – 5th Round – I don’t rate Hue Jackson as highly as most – he’s an excellent, innovative coach, but he calls too many ‘look-at-me-I’m-so-smart’ plays – and when he says to trust him on the Kessler pick, I don’t. But Kessler is actually a very good player, so I don’t need to. 2015 was a step backwards, and I have a feeling he’d have been more highly drafted 12 months ago, but he was a three year starter who completed over 65% of passes each year (peaking at 69.7%), averaged 8.2ypa, threw 88tds to only 19ints and had a PER just shy of 170 in 2014 (156 career PER). They’re remarkably consistent numbers, and the fear would be that that’s his level, or that his size and athleticism could be issues, but he is worthy of more consideration than you might have thought.

Christian Hackenberg – Undrafted – If you’re stupid enough to touch him, you deserve everything you get. Hackenberg will get a chance in New York I suspect, and long-suffering Jets fans can reminisce about Mark Sanchez not being that bad really when he does. I’m not just predicting Hackenberg will be a bust, I’m guaranteeing it. Guys who can’t complete 60% of passes in college crash and burn in the NFL.

Dak Prescott – 7th Round – Will get a chance when Romo breaks down, he’s actually not a bad QB, with Wentz like numbers in the passing game and a better rushing game. Obviously there’s other concerns about him, which is why he dropped, but as a potential starting QB… He’s pretty good.

Connor Cook – Undrafted – Ignore the stuff his Dad’s been saying, ignoring the questions about the captaincy. There’s one reason why Cook isn’t an NFL QB – he doesn’t have the arm. A sub 60% passer, he’s not accurate, and he makes Teddy look like Ben Roethlisberger in terms of arm strength. On one level this is a shame, as Cook actually had reasonable efficiency numbers and he doesn’t turn it over much, he also has an exceptional blitz pick-up. But he’s not displacing Derek Carr anyway, so you’d be foolish to waste a pick on him.

The Rest – Undrafted – I liked both Brandons, Doughty (over 5,000 yards in 2015!) and Allen were good college QBs, but being late round picks stuck behind good, young starters in Miami and Jacksonville respectively makes their value basically zero in fantasy terms. I have no idea why the Pats wasted a third on Jacoby Brisset (beaten out for the Gators job by Jeff Driskel – and you’d have to be pretty drunk to draft him as anything other than an elaborate joke on your co-manager), and most of the others I couldn’t even remember the names of let alone give a reasonable opinion of. Cardale Jones at the Bills might be worth a thought, but only if the Bills can’t get a deal done with Tyrod Taylor, he’s not worth more than picking up after the draft and stashing on a taxi squad.

*[Player B was Wentz, Player A was Stick]